Japanese Banks! (Ass Kicking via Financial Institution)

My mission today was to buy a bus pass and send money to my mom in the US from my Japanese account.

Mission 1: Purchase Bus Pass
Its 8:30am and I approach the bus terminal ticketing window. I pass my proof of student discount under the glass because I don't know how to say "Bus Pass" in Japanese. The 50-something woman, looks at me, frowns. "Here, fill this out over there." Taking the bus pass request slip that I was told I didn't need by my school yesterday morning, and begin to fill it out. It took me about 3 solid minutes of just scanning the sheet to figure out where my name, address, pass start date, and school info goes. Once I filled it out to my best ability, I go up to the window where the younger, and somewhat nicerlooking ticketing agent is--the older woman is still frowning at me. She smiles sweetly and I pass the form and proof of student discount to her. All seems to have been performed according to expectations because she starts making my pass.

It hits me, how much is this gonna cost? She finishes and tells me the price "27500円". Shit, I only have 12,000 on me.

"Can you hold on a second, I'm going to go to the ATM for more money. I'll be right back!"

I run to the ATM two blocks away and try to use my BofA card in the ATM. "This card cannot be used" flashes accross the screen. Shit. I switch cards and wow, it works! Here's where my idiocy (others would say bubbly nature) fucks up my day, I can't remember how much the pass was. I take out 10000yen and hope its enough. I run back, shit, still short by 2500yen. I run for the second time to and fro with 5000yen worth of fresh bills in my wallet.

Mission 1: Successfully completed.


Mission 2: International Money Transfer
After getting my bus pass, I walk for the 3rd time back to the bank and wait, it won't open 'til 9 (current time: 8:45). 9:00:00AM open! In I walk, and look around. Shit, where do I do this?. Awkwardly and in terribly broken Japanese, I ask a security guard "Where can I transfer funds?" He says the 2nd floor. Everyone in the room, during the duration of the 30 second conversation turned to look at me. A strange old man is standing 3 ft from me and asks in what I call Katakana English if there is a problem? No, I'm fine. Up to the second floor I go.

So, I've been sitting in front of the clerk for 30 minutes and we have successfully filled out 40% of the form. For every sentence she says, I use my dictionary at least twice to understand the keywords. This process is a long and drawn out one. Eventually I leave the bank an hour and a half after entering, feeling somewhat satisfied that I've successfully sent my money.

Mission 2: Transfer Complete. WRONG!
I was $500 short on my payment to my mom. damnitalltohell.

money matters + language barriers = frustration.

The Study Abroad Hero's Journey

Call to Adventure:
An opportunity to go abroad and experience a new way of living in a new world. Most of these heroes are eager to go abroad.

In the Belly of the Whale: (Entering Into an Unknown Culture)

“It is like crossing a threshold from one’s past life into a totally different life. Guards that make crossing the threshold difficult:

• culturally inappropriate constraints
• deep distrust of hero as a stranger
• lack of language ability
• community of other heroes (expatriates) that severely restricts interaction with members of host community (i.e. golden ghetto)

“If the [hero] is not careful or is willing to succumb to these guardians, she or he will not be able to finish the hero’s journey.” Just because you’re a hero, doesn’t mean everything will be smooth or that you’ll be a good hero.

The Magical Friend:
The hero finds a magical friend (or cultural mentor).

• often member of new culture or a seasoned hero
• serves as initial guide (helps language concerns living accommodations, social contacts, advice for greater work effectiveness)

Hero should never complain about other culture.

“Complaints have a way of slowing down the process of finding these magical friends, especially among members of the new culture itself.”

Road of Trials: (Paradoxes)
The hero must eventually embark on a journey of his own. He will face many trials in the form of paradoxes.

“Paradoxes are seemingly contradictory but equally true ideas that emerge as one tries to mediate between two cultures.”

1. “Seeing as valid the general stereotype about the local culture, but also realizing that many host-country nationals do not fit that stereotype.” The hero is forced to be aware of individuals, instead of just cultural membership.
2. “Feeling at ease anywhere, but belonging nowhere.” The hero may begin to feel at home in many places and situations, but may still not fit in. “A certain feeling marginality often exists even upon returning home, as the hero and his community have both change during the journey.”
3. “Feeling caught between the contradictory demands of headquarters on one hand and the demands of the host-country nationals and the local situations on the other.” The hero becomes a translator for both groups, “trying to convey the point of view of the home office to those in the new culture without losing their trust and explaining what can effectively be done in the new culture to the home office without being accused of ‘going native.’”
4. The hero giving up some of his “home community cultural ideas and behaviors in order to be accepted and successful in the other culture while at the same time finding some of [his] core home values becoming even stronger as a result of exposure to another culture.” These changes are necessary for the hero to be effective and avoid standing out in negative ways.
5. “Becoming more and more ‘world-minded’ as a result of exposure to different values and conflicting loyalties, but becoming more idiosyncratic in putting together the hero’s own value system and views of life… A hero tends to recreate her or his identity in unique ways even as she or he is more aware and accepting of many different identities.”

Ultimate Boom and Return:
The hero has learned to sacrifice for the good of others, yet has developed a self-sufficiency and inner power that allows for the accomplishment of seemingly impossible tasks. He has grown, matured, a broader perspective of the world, a greater appreciation of differences, has better work skills, can better lead others in accomplishing important goals, has a wider base of knowledge and understanding, and has developed closer richer personal and family relationships.

“On the hero’s return he or she often finds that things have changed.”

Source: 1995. Osland, J.S. The Adventure of Working Abroad. Jossy Bass: San Francisco. pp190.

My Favorite Things

After about a week of brooding about how much I dislike Japan, I realized it might be a better idea to just, indulge, and not in a eat everything that’s terrible for you sense, but indulge in the everything that brings joy sense.

First, quirky inventions that are so convenient or useful but when we use them or tell someone about your having used them, they look at you funny. Example: Sauna pants


Second, Celebrity Ads. Perhaps Japanese talent agents just work five times harder than their American counterparts, but if you have a favorite celebrity (Japanese or not) or simply can recognize one (or maybe you’re a Japanophile and know two), then you will see their face(s) smashed onto a dog’s body or holding a bucket of chicken. This will happen to you at the very least, once a week.

For me, it’s daily. And if you get easily excited and yelp when you see a person you recognize (celebrity or not), then your reactions will be considered “extreme” by everyone within a kilometer radius of your noisy mouth, like me. In Kobe, we were walking down the shopping lane of the train station, “eki,” and I saw Oguri Shun in the window of a drug store, immediately pointed like a blood hound and shouted “OGURI SHUN! Look!” Everyone, as instructed, looked, and then frowned, “Kim, calm down.” It’s worth noting that as my arm shot out in a 90° angle accurately pointed at the shampoo bottle he was holding, I almost punched a passing Japanese young woman with my forefinger. The friend that noticed frowned at me. Lesson learned: control [involuntary] reactions.


Third, if you’re in Japan, or have the opportunity to watch direct-from-Japan ads, do so, jump at the chance, youtube something if you must, just do it. Japanese TV commercials, CM as their called, are the funniest of their genre I have scene, on par with the best Super-Bowl commercials you still remember and talk about (still very upset I couldn’t watch any this year—Japanese don’t like [American] Football). You shouldn’t watch while eating/drinking any hot liquids, we have the TV on during dinner and its very difficult not to snort my Miso soup during commercial breaks. Disclaimer: don’t get your hopes up. I have a strange sense of humor.

Fourth, Uniforms. For service industry jobs, as almost any job in Japan except university student (is that a job at all?) there is a uniform to be worn daily. One must, MUST wear it exactly, EXACTLY as expected and instructed. Take this Oriental Hotel bellman pictured here. Note the type of hat he is wearing. (If you know the name, tell me. now please.) Also notice how the hat blends with his uniform over all, its very nice isn’t it? ‘makes him feel like he’s from some early period piece, and by that I mean a movie that was based in the late 1900s Britain. He doesn’t seem to fit though, maybe thats cuz hes asian…


Lastly, western people mix so awkwardly with Asians 90% of the time. This is partial due to with the nature of both parties simply being terribly different and usually fairly ignorant about one another. But mostly this is because the western standard of awkward and the Japanese standard of awkward is the same, but neither partly knows how to prevent nor remove the awkward turtle once he has shown his scaly, wrinkly face. Even I, an extremely awkward person who has successfully managed to control the level of awkwardness in most situations, am hopelessly lost in the ways of the Western-Japanese Awkward Turtle…

In Japan, even Starbucks counts down until the sakura flowers bloom.